As readers might have noticed, here I am once more.

There’s a long, complex, story behind my absence but, for the sake of prudence, I’ll keep it quasi-short -- for now. I’ve always maintained I would blog as long as nobody got hurt. A few months ago I was led to believe that someone I cared very much about was being harmed because of my activities with I HeArTE JADE. I felt I couldn’t, with good conscience, continue to update. I never would have guessed that I would become a victim of my own con, nor that I would be mulcted in such a way by Law Enforcement, but, like most folks, I’ve been conditioned to believe whatever handsome men with shiny badges in positions of authority tell me. You’d think I’d know better by now. Ha! Fortunately I’ve deduced the entire thing was capital B capital S, thus… hello again! At the moment expect sporadic entries.

Hmm... what else is there to share?

I have continued throughout to periodically post on my VSP site. Well, hell, I never implied I would abandon my other projects. By the way, if there’s a Virginia State Policeman out there who isn’t deceitful or a moron or a coward, or, worse, all three, I’d love to talk to him. I have arrant faith he indeed exists. Somewhere.

On 03/29/2011, the fantastically sexy Granville Fields was cited in Charlottesville for reckless driving. Do you know how bad what he did had to be for that to happen?! Naturally he got himself a lawyer, Jessica Phillips, and probably, much like former Albemarle County Policeman Eric Kudro did when he was charged with the same, he’ll get out of it. His next court date is scheduled for 06/02/2011, 9:05AM.

Speaking of cutie Kudro, last word I got on him was that his resignation from the ACPD stemmed from his refusal to submit to a random drug test. Since he does have a bit of a reputation as a “partier,” I’m inclined to buy this as a valid explanation.

The Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement Task Force has only minimally made the news during my down time. I’m not convinced the stuff is at all worth mentioning, although any reference to JADE boosts my stats.

I am dying for a new scanner. The ones I’m eyeballing cost the big bucks, which means I may actually die before I accumulate the necessary funds.

Last and least relevant, I’m plumb gaga over The Voice. Plus SouthLAnd, in all its killerism, has been renewed for another season -- hoorah!

Eric Kudro Is No Longer One Of My Favorite Albemarle County Police Department Officers.

Because Eric Kudro is no longer an Albemarle County Police Department officer.

He and another ACPD policeman, David Moody, simultaneously recently up and resigned from the force.

Rumors -- from the perfectly plausible to the plainly preposterous -- about their emergent departure are rampant, and with everybody participating in the gossip, it’s doubtful anybody is ever going to get to the whole truth. Near as I’ve gathered, it’s just another squalid mess in which the innocent are mostly the only affected.

Whatever the deal, due to this latest stunt of his, I’ve lost a significant piece of site-filler. It’s totally the equivalent of having an awesome character on a favorite teevee show killed off. Thus…

Dear former Officer Kudro,

Please join the Virginia State Police.

That is all.

Merry Chri... Happy New Ye... Uhm, Great Sunday?

In December I’d expected to hit 500 entries before the end of 2010

But...

Plus I was going to let one of my favorite Albemarle County Police Officers, Eric Kudro, wish all my readers a Merry Christmas



But…

Then I had a pile of photographs, that ever-so-neatly avoided violating the conditions, prepared to accompany a prospective mainstream news story about a bust by Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement (JADE) Task Force

But…

And naturally I planned on posting a facetious snippet, or picture to kick off the new year

But…

The past couple of weeks I’ve been up to my cortex in a confection of necessary business, amazing friends, sexy men, and plenty of a fabulous concoction of Beer, Limes, and Tequila -- mostly set to Drop It Low and parallel lyrical euphonies at an insane eardrum-throbbing volume. What else can I say

But…

Here’s to a wonderful 2011!

Nic Nick Nicky Nicholas Rudman

Here ya go, sweetheart, since I caught you looking, I’ve made it nice and easy for you to track yourself on this site; oh, and I included your name here, too, for others who seek you out as well -- ‘cause I’m all courteous like that. I also added Greene County Sheriff’s Office Investigator Rodney Snead to my Entry Labels list. Can’t have him feeling left out or anything.

Speaking of searches, recently a mass amount of New Yorkers have landed here due to their Craig Sorokti queries. In fact, according to last month’s keyword activity, Officer Sorokti actually exceeded superterrif ACPD honey Eric Kudro in hits. I never thought I’d see the moment anyone would surpass him!

Lessee… Incomers for Marc Brake (under several variations), the usual iheartejades and i hearte jades, someone wanting Michael Hogberg’s court date, plus a Sirchie.

And one CESAR RUIZ AYALA NUPCIAS TUXTLA GUTIERREZ. Yeah, no, I haven’t the muzziest what that’s about either.

See, I Told You So -- Eric Kudro Is Just MADE For JADE!

October 2010

Albemarle County Police arrested two men for possession of narcotics, including crack cocaine and marijuana, following a traffic stop early Thursday morning.

Officer Kudro, of the County Police Department, stopped a vehicle in the 1000 block of Seminole Trail around 12:30am Thursday. While conducting the traffic stop, the officer reports noticing a smell of marijuana coming from the vehicle. He also determined the passenger of the vehicle was wanted for an outstanding felony warrant.

Upon search of the vehicle, Officer Kudro located 133.2 grams of crack cocaine, 15 grams of marijuana, a 9mm handgun and $644 in cash.

(More)

Whatcha Doin' This Weekend?

Tonight officially begins my second 48 hours in the slammer. Depending on the capriciousness of they that run the place, I may be in there for 72. Any which way, here’s to great site fodder!

Some random stuff relating to last week:

On I HeArTE JADE blogging… I am so glad I held back publishing my account of the month in 2009 I spent in Albemarle-Charlottesville Regional Jail. Aside from possibly incurring the beastliness of a handful of Correctional Officers during this recent stint, half my tricks for survival would’ve been rendered useless.

On hitchhiking there… I made sure I got to the area in plenty of time lest I had to walk the whole way to ACRJ from where I parked my car. The upside was I caught a ride as soon as I crossed the street and stuck out my thumb; the downside was I arrived at the establishment ridiculously early and had to hang around their waiting room before they’d let me check in.

On Intake… Through the pseudo-glass partitions I got a glimpse of my favorite ACPD troublemaker: Officer Eric Kudro himself. I thought of a million witty things to holler at the boyish-looking powerhouse who’s known for getting sloshed and slurping syrup but, considering he’s been being almost good lately, I just grinned at him and left it at that.

On ACRJ personnel… I recognized a lot of the guards from last time. Truth be told, a few are triple evil, a few are honest-to-heaven angels, and the majority are completely indifferent to everyone around them.

On hitchhiking back… ‘Twas a dark and stormy night. A mother of two, traveling alone, in a minivan picked me up. It got me thinking that maybe Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement should spitcan all their officers and replace them with soccer moms -- since they seem to be a lot less fearful than current Task Force members.

No Post Title

This morning was Albemarle County Officer Eric Kudro’s make-up day in Waynesboro General District Court. I’d already decided I wasn’t going to miss witnessing it for nothin’. I believed he was going to get away with his hit-and-not-run charge -- which he did -- but how it played out exceeded even my expectations.

I pulled into a favorable parking place near the courthouse slightly before 9AM. When I crossed the threshold of the justice building, I immediately saw a third-rate printout taped on a four-foot-high signpost stationed between myself and the metal detector. After reading its message, I promptly spun about and headed back to my vehicle.

Being somewhat familiar with courthouse policies, I typically carry a mere two items with me when visiting such an establishment: the solitary piece of formed metal that opens and starts my car, and my cell phone. Unlike the City of Charlottesville and Albemarle County courts, according to the public display I’d a moment ago seen, Waynesboro’s bans cellulars, period. Won’t be long, I think, before even my single key is going to be forbidden.

I tossed the contraband in my auto console and engaged the lock again.

Upon reentering the edifice, I deposited and recovered my one allowed object into and from the guard’s obligatory Gladware, stepped through the security device without incident, and took the door “on the left” that’d been pointed out to me. Traffic court was already in session.

The boyish-looking policeman I’d come to watch was easy to spot. Aside from lawyers and other cops inside the partitioned-off bench area, Mr. Kudro was the only person in the room dressed in a full suit. I’d figured he’d either wear that or his ACPD uniform. No way would he dared show up in normal attire.

He was sitting in the right front pew, on the far left side. I chose a seat three rows behind him, on the far right side. I spent the next forty minutes or so listening to victims and officers tell their tales to the judge while I observed Mr. Kudro’s stop-and-go habit of chomping much too enthusiastically on the gob of gum in his mouth.

There was the guy who was “only stopping fer a cuppa coffee, your honor,” the one who quetched about being racially profiled and denied resembling a drug dealer, the fellow who inebriatedly bailed on his alcohol-aroma-ish sedan leaving $28 dollars worth of damage behind, the woman in pajama bottoms and one sock, this speeder, that speeder… finally the nine o’clockers were over.

There was a nod to Eric Kudro by, I presume, an attorney and the judge called his name. I simultaneously scampered up to the same bench the baby-face-with-a-badge had just abandoned to better hear what would transpire.

I kid you not, whatever happened took less than thirteen seconds. Not even thirty -- thirteen! I blinked once and it was over. No account of the violation. No explanations. There was no pretense of legal procedure. They barely went through the motions. It took me longer to pick my jaw up off the floor.

At the courthouse after the… oh my gosh, I don’t even know what to call it -- other than a ridiculous farce, I spoke to someone in the know and learned the case had been dismissed because Officer Kudro “took care” of the other driver involved. Short of contacting that party, I guess I’ll never know what went on.

Maybe some things are better left to wonder about. Plus there’s always next time. Yessir, there will be a next time. We are talking about Eric Kudro you know.

Kid Kudro

Eric Kudro: Psychic Superhero

Michael Dennis Hogberg, the guy that ACPD Officer Eric Kudro tasered back when, has made the news again. This latest story on him -- basically a drunk driving incident -- isn’t much interesting to me per se, though I do find one of the multiple charges he’s facing iffy. (If not crashing into a Virginia State Policeman’s cruiser warrants attempted capital murder of a police officer, then there ought also be a count of attempted murder for each and every other innocent person Mr. Hogberg passed but didn’t hit during this dangerous alcoholic stunt behind the wheel.)

However, I figured the marvelously hubristic Mr. Kudro, still indignant at people’s unsupportive reaction to his own takedown of Mr. Hogberg, would try to use this arrest as vindication to justify those earlier actions of his. Sure enough, I found his post on Topix, so, wow, I must be clairvoyant like Mr. Kudro as well! (Hey, maybe we could get, like, a whole X-Men thing going on -- Kudro… me… that County cop who I heard has a Spiderman symbol tattooed on his upper arm…) Naturally it will not occur to the unthinking public that Mr. Kudro had no possible way of knowing what Mr. Hogberg would do in the future and therefore is absolutely still lacking in the area of self-control. Hmm… maybe Mr. Kudro is putting that high IQ of his to good use.



But if our Superhero’s plan was for everyone to pat him on the back now, well, I think he forgot to let me and, uh, someone in Korea in on it.

I’m Gonna Have To Stop Typing About The Guy ‘Cause I’m Running Out Of Ideas For Post Titles On Him

I’m getting comments about Eric Kudro.

One reader emailed (links added by me for context):

Kudro's a mess! I read the post where he took some popo driving course, so that makes him doubly ridiculous hahahaa. Can't wait to find out if he was texting, reaching for a waffle he dropped or just what. I wonder if he's going to be applying for unemployment soon or if the car wreck was just karma.

I predict -- based on the, granted limited, information I have -- that Officer Kudro, with the assistance of an attorney, will dispute the citation in court. The judge, who normally would always side with the ticketing officer, won’t want to leave a permanent black mark on the record of a member of Law Enforcement, therefore he’ll find in favor of Officer Kudro.

The ticketing officer will win for appearing to not let the badge of his fellow lawman influence his decision of who was at fault, Officer Kudro will win because he’ll get away with the offense, and the judge will win because neither officer will be upset or occupationally harmed by his ruling.

I doubt the media will do a follow-up on this reckless driving charge, and I like to see things through, so I’m tempted to go to court and observe.

Another reader -- and, presumably, an actual acquaintance of Mr. Kudro -- extolled the virtues and brought up a few personal struggles of the Albemarle County policeman. I won’t quote what the correspondent wrote because it’d be dirty to publicly dish it. The gist is that Mr. Kudro is a fine, fine, man and I ought not pick on him because, aw, woe, hasn’t he suffered enough?

It does my ego good that someone feels my opinion of Eric Kudro matters to Eric Kudro, but let’s be for real here; I have no effect on his life whatsoever. I also tend to think Mr. Kudro, if he’s even paying I HeArTE JADE any attention, can probably handle my ribbing him. If he can’t, well, he has no effect on my life whatsoever. Of course I state that with fingers crossed that I never find my body in range of his Taser or my car parked on any route he drives his vehicle.

OMG -- Assign Him To JADE Already!

Cruiser crash leads to investigation

WAYNESBORO — A Sunday traffic crash prompted the Albemarle County Police Department to launch an internal investigation into an officer who wrecked his cruiser, police said.

Waynesboro police Sgt. Kelly Walker said Albemarle police Officer Eric Michael Kudro, 29, of Waynesboro, was driving on the 400 block of North Delphine Avenue when he veered right and sideswiped a 1996 Ford Ranger.

Kudro pulled his 2009 Ford Crown Victoria about 300 feet away and took in the damage, police said: an estimated $5,000 to the cruiser and $8,000 to the pickup truck.

Police charged Kudro with failure to maintain proper control. He was headed home when the crash occurred.

Albemarle police spokesman Shawn Schwertfeger said Monday that the office investigates every traffic crash that involves a department officer.

No one was injured in the crash.

(Source)

Don’t Say He “Makes Poor Choices,” Say He “Inspires Policy Changes”

Remember that Taser incident involving Albemarle County policeman Eric Kudro? The County, here several months later, has pulled a nice public relations move. They’ve revised their policy regarding Taser usage. Officially, no longer will their officers be permitted to use the electrical device on handcuffed or fleeing prisoners.

It seems to me what they’re basically saying is that they don’t trust the members of their force to make good decisions in bad situations -- which, bottom line, really sucks for officer morale. But I admit I look at things a little bit different than most. The Hook has a more in-depth article -- with a catchy headline -- that probably better reflects majority thinking. The most notable thing in their piece, as far as I’m concerned, is the unnamed “senior law enforcement official” who proves, once again, that, in private, cops do turn on each other.

As for the undisciplined Mr. Kudro, I still think he’s got a great future with JADE.

Waving For Wednesday

I have a few errands to run around Court Square. If you’re not familiar with the area, it’s where several courthouses are located and it’s often frequented by policemen, attorneys, lawbreakers, me.

Some time ago when I was there I caught an STD -- Special Treatment Display. I saw a black truck parked in the vicinity that had this rectangular black sticker, with a blue line through it, on the rear glass. If the adhesive itself wasn’t enough to alert people to the fact that the owner of the vehicle is in Law Enforcement, the rig being in a spot reserved for officers certainly was. I took a few snapshots of it, all the while thinking a) so much for policemen not wanting to be identified as policemen, and b) there’s nothing to prevent non-cops from slapping the silly thing on their own automobiles. Unfortunately, my memory card in my camera went kaput and all those pictures were destroyed. Not too long afterward, interestingly enough, a Massachusetts-based site (now defunct) I follow put up a post, complete with visual aids -- pun intended -- about these STDs.

So I’m on my way to speak to a court clerk about a ticket when I roll up on a car that’s got an STD. Now, the sedan isn’t nearly as snazzy as the pickup and I’m wondering if its operator is really an officer. Regardless, I tug my equipment out to take photographs. As he and I navigate the road I click the shutter here and there.

It occurs to me as I’m getting closer to my destination that I’ve not had to deviate from my intended route while trailing after this unknown person. In fact, the further along we ride the more I think we’re going to the same place. And the more I think we’re going to the same place the more I think he likely is an officer. I try to remember who’s supposed to be in court today, but it escapes me. When we get closer to downtown, he turns left and I proceed straight. I attempt a side shot as I pass him but I get a “card read error” message -- I’ve just lost every image I took. Abandoning the gizmo, I make a left at my preferred street, right at the next one, and right on the one where I hope to leave my ride.

The STD-user is parallel parking right in front of me. I wait for enough room to edge by, then pull my own parallel parking job two spaces ahead of him. A silver something-compact separates us. I shove a back-up card into the camera and, via my side mirror, snag the man I’d been curious about: Albemarle County officer Eric Kudro. I should’ve known.

Another ACPD man approaches Mr. Kudro and they chat briefly before splitting to take care of business. I exit, gadget-in-hand, and round the Hyundai getting images. Again the card malfunctions. I give up, and move off to do my thing.

When I return, his Sonata is still in place. I sit in my car for a few minutes and fiddle with the camera and storage device. It appears that, though the earlier pics are irretrievable, it’s performing once more. However I can’t hop out for re-dos because Mr. Kudro is back.

I pull out after he glides by. It’s not easy to photograph in this particular setting and I’m not pleased with my stabs at it. I don’t have time for this. I have somewhere else to be this morning, although, even if I didn’t, I do not have the slightest inclination to go traipsing after Eric Kudro. Blah. At this point all I want is just one single flippin’ picture of THE DANG STICKER IN THE CAR WINDOW!

Lucky me, we draw a stoplight. I raise the camera, psychologically cross my fingers, and press the button. I got it. I lower the contraption and peek down to power it off. I glance up. Surprise! Mr. Kudro is waving. At me. Well, it’s not like I thought he wouldn’t see what I was up to. Our bumpers are practically French-kissing! I laugh out loud. And wave back. I keep behind him only to my necessary path, and there we part ways.

Later, I recover some, not all, of the event’s images.

____________ ♥ ____________

I have to pick something up shortly after two this afternoon. It’s too early to head to the location it’s at, too late to do much of anything important. I drum up an entertaining way to fill the time. There’s a Deputy with one of the two local Sheriff’s Departments who’s extremely fun to flirt with, so… I make use of a temporary parking space to hunt him down. I’m disappointed to find out he’s not around, but it’s nice to know he’s enjoying this sunny, beautiful day elsewhere. Good for him!

I start my car, step on the brake, peer in the rearview mirror. An Albemarle County traffic cop I recognize appears in the reflective glass -- he’s just come around the corner of a brick building, on foot.

You know how people make cop-and-doughnut jokes? Seriously, this fellow looks like he scarfs down a dozen Krispy Kremes every morning. Followed by three hours in a gym working them off. That man? Is beautiful. Yum. And I don’t usually find guys under 40 attractive.

I know where Officer Machismo’s vehicle is parked because I saw it when I was pulling in; he’s only got about 150 feet to cover to reach it. I sense, more than see, his eyes land on my car. Abruptly he spins on his heels and disappears back the way he came. Huh. That was weird. Maybe he heard one of his buddies holler at him or something. As I reverse, I mentally replay his odd move and have another thought. Jeez, I wonder if he thinks he’s the reason I’m here.

My sole exit -- proof I wasn’t cop-watching: I never would’ve left myself trapped like this under those circumstances -- puts me on the short side street, which, like many in Charlottesville, is one way. Ugh. This is so irritating! I need to go the opposite way I’m being impelled to go.

I roll by Officer Machismo’s unmarked ride. Signs at the intersection indicate I have no choice but to go right. I obey, and not just ‘cause it’s convenient. The upcoming road is also a one way, but it flows the direction I need and I turn onto it. A blue minivan in front of me has numerous bumper stickers. I read enough of them to determine the owner is probably an obnoxious White female without a husband, with two children, no gun, and a President she voted for but now contemns. Boooooring. My gaze shifts to a pedestrian who, up until that moment, has been obscured by the van.

It’s Officer Machismo. Ahck! Talk about takin’ the long way. So he was trying to avoid me! Sneaky little... I feel my lips shape to a smirk. He registers me a split-second later; I can tell as soon as it hits him because his face flashes a myriad of expressions, one of which come across as stunned, another sheepish. Darnit! Now he definitely thinks he’s the reason I’m here; it looks like I circled the block just to catch him. It’s evident the wheels are turning in his mind, too. Wait; he’s gonna do something. What’s he gonna do? His elbow bends, his arm comes up. He’s waving. I bite back a snicker. I lift my hand and wiggle my fingers in return. I burst out laughing, and in a blink he becomes nothing more than background scenery -- very-physically-fit background scenery.

Kudro Konductivity

So I thought by now someone in Mediawood might’ve perhaps hinted at the outcome of the “internal review” Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro purportedly was facing. Especially since the Taser incident was all the rage less than a month ago.

Am I the only one who doesn’t frequent Short-Attention-Span Theater?


(Eric Kudro, left, pictured with Officer William Kavanah)

“Once it hits your lips, it’s so good!” says Eric Kudro

This is Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro, of Waynesboro:

Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro, of Waynesboro, has virtually nothing to do, intrinsically, with the Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement (JADE) Task Force.

Why then, you ask, is Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro, of Waynesboro, being featured on I HeArTE JADE when he has virtually nothing to do, intrinsically, with the Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement (JADE) Task Force?

Well, then, since you asked why Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro, of Waynesboro, is being featured on I HeArTE JADE when he has virtually nothing to do, intrinsically, with the Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement (JADE) Task Force, I will tell you.

Now that Albemarle County Police Officer Eric Kudro, of Waynesboro, has clearly demonstrated he’s a Law Enforcement member who’s not afraid to take someone down, there’s a great possibility he has a killer future with the Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement (JADE) Task Force. I just wanna be sure I get a sweet jump on that, y’all.

But mostly it’s because I haven’t touched base with Google in a couple of days.

Keyword Analysis

Yesterday the great Google sent 18 “i hearte jade,” 16 “i heart jade,” and 2 “i hate jade taskforce” to me. Only a guess but I betcha those last two seekers were law enforcement looking for my site; they’re stone determined to believe I’m a cop-hater.

Most of the search terms that bring new readers here are relevant:

coke bust in charlottesville

jade task force charlottesville

detective brian o’donnell

brian lamont robinson

Some queries are applicable, yet are not:

1511 mulberry st waynesboro va

I won’t even get into the ones that are completely not -- those freaks should be searching RedTube.

I get a crazy amount of hits from people looking for policeman Eric M. Kudro. I assume the following phrases, which I’ve gotten just in the last few hours, are because of his weekend “can’t catch ‘em, taser ‘em” philosophy.

police eric kudro

eric kudro officer charlottesville va

“eric kudro” cop news

Is there any officer working in Charlottesville or Albemarle County who hasn’t electrocuted or shot somebody?

Oh. The. Irony.

This is a replica of an actual document. Having witnessed the way this particular JADE guy drives, I found it humorous.


By Order of: Chief John F. Miller (signature on file)
T.R. Received: 8/26/08. Issued By: Ofc. C. Morris, 8/26/2008
-----------------------------------------------------------------
PURPOSE: The purpose of this Training Order is to advise personnel of scheduled training.
PROCEDURE: As is below.
____________________________________
CLASS/SCHOOL: Driver Training
LOCATION: Shenandoah Track
DATES/TIMES: Oct. 13, 2008 (0800-1700)
ATTENDEES: Glenn Fink, Ben Reeves, Jonathan McKay, Jonathan Hickory, Todd Lytton, Robert Byram, Eric Kudro, Candace Pack, Jason Taylor, Andrew Gluba, Caleb Marden, Trevor Ross
INSTRUCTORS: TBA
____________________________________