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This is the problem when one doesn’t post frequently: stuff piles up. Hmm... let’s see... where to begin?

According to City of Charlottesville General District Court records, on June 2, 2011, the sexy hot -- my adjectives, not the judicial system’s -- Granville Fields was deemed not guilty of his March reckless driving charge. Surprise! Oh, no, wait; a surprise would’ve been the opposite verdict. Naturally he had an attorney, Jessica Phillips, which, regardless of if you aren’t an officer and are darn certain you’re going to get away with your misdeeds, is always a sharp move.

Not a sharp move is agreeing to let Law Enforcement without a warrant search your property. Granted, they’ll invariably be granted the necessary paperwork, but, no matter how persuasive men with badges can be -- and they can, indeed, be persuasive -- and how innocent you’re positive you are, sheesh, assert your rights people!

Philip Cobbs consented to a warrantless search and look where it got him. The majority of ‘net commentators on his ordeal seemed to have either gotten sidetracked by the least significant part: the amount of marijuana discovered on Mr. Cobbs’ land -- as if two pot plants aren’t as illegal as a dozen or a thousand -- or turned it into yet another excuse to rail about legalization. Hello? Members of the Virginia State Police and Jefferson Area Drug Enforcement Task Force didn’t even bother to document alleged evidence. Since it wasn’t a pat-on-the-back-worthy bust, they, I believe, plunked it in toto on the lap of County Officer Trevor Ross a month later. I surmise, true to their typical cocky selves, the Boys In Blue knew a judge would merely take them on their word for the way it went down, how they behaved, and what precisely they saw. They were correct the first round. I wish the Rutherford Institute best of luck battling against such odds in the next.

Settled out of court was the Gerry Mitchell vs Albemarle County Police Department lawsuit. One of their fine officers, Gregory Davis, while in his patrol car struck a wheelchair-bound man crossing the road. Originally when I watched the cruiser cam video of the incident, I was willing to give the cop the benefit of the doubt; I thought perhaps the ACPD driver hadn’t seen Mr. Mitchell because the front frame of the auto at the left of the windshield on his vehicle obscured the view of the area the pedestrian was in. Then I heard Davis was texting a woman at the time of the hit. This was later confirmed. Speaking from experience, mobile phones can be quite distracting to lawmen especially when a kitty is on the other end. Me-yow.

Eric Abshire was convicted in October of murdering his wife Justine. I’d been mildly interested in the case and my State Policeman, Tony Gattuso Jr., having worked on it a bit, kindly provided me inside details. VSP Special Agent Gattuso also told me that since the evidence was circumstantial he thought Mr. Abshire would likely walk away from the crime a free man; I disagreed, simply because juries are incredibly stupid and have no concept of “reasonable doubt.” I’d published on the web some of the information supplied to me by my darling Tony and one site I posted it on promptly deleted it. Hilarious that media are more concerned about what a leaky Virginia State Policeman did or said than the Agency he belongs to is.

I haven’t recently added anything to the My State Policeman blog. I need to type a narrative of a disturbing phone conversation Tony and me had about his living situation and girlfriend, but, frankly, I haven’t been much inspired to write -- obviously. Once I get around to it though I can hark back to the mundane copying and pasting of our email exchanges. I’d intended to wrap up the site at the point our relationship ended, however, upon a subsequent three-month-long investigation of my former sweetheart’s activities pre- and post-me, there’s uber oodles of fabulous turpitudes that I unearthed for me to terminate it there now. From my contact with Troopers’ wives he used to bang back in the days when he was a lowly Trooper himself to tracking multiple craigslist sex ads hookups he’s had, I’ve been rather a busy detective slash spy. Can ya believe I was not Tony’s sole other lover from February 2010 on? I reiterate: thank heavens I documented every ounce of “us.” There’s a couple of loose pieces his ex-pseudo-wife Brenda Priebe could help tie up for curious me if she’d be so inclined; shame she’s one of those uppity things, a big important person who strictly associates with clones of herself. I guess he didn’t lie about everything.

Sadly it’s apparent Tony never actually liked me. I’ve concluded he deliberately targets females to con that he feels -- erroneously or not -- are super intelligent. Keeping the wool pulled over their eyes is his idea of reassuring himself he’s smart. Unfortunately for him, he’s not bright enough to pull it off with everyone. Funny, he probably would’ve been successful on that front with Miz Priebe had it not been for me. Hoo-ah! Yeah, that completes my psychoanalyzing Anthony Gattuso.

An unidentified-to-the-public Albemarle County officer shot his own hand during weapon training at the Rivanna Rifle and Pistol Club. Numerous ACPD officials state accidents of this type wouldn’t occur if their department had its own facility to practice at, thereby increasing the amount of firearm preparedness.

The same county has a fresh armada of police vehicles coming in. Chief Steve Sellers said “To our officers it represents a new beginning, a fresh start as a police department and a commitment to the community.” I’m not certain what anybody else in his community thinks but I’d prefer to have cops who know how to handle their guns than have ones with new cars.

At least one lawyer I’m acquainted with is doing a happy dance that Randall Snead did not get elected Sheriff of Greene County.

In a strange twist, I got a lada nada to report on the Charlottesville Police Department as a whole. Individually? Loose lips revealed that CPD Chief Timothy Longo has been compelled to remark in specific company that Officer Brian N. O’Donnell and I were not involved sexually. Whatever. Despite Joe Hatter having had a few personal issues subsequent to my last update, none of them belong here. Rumor has it that Paul Best and his fiancĂ©e broke up. Or they got married. Perfect example of why two sources are not necessarily better than one.

A daily visitor to I HeArTE JADE has offered yours truly a round-trip ticket to Europe. I’m still considering the invitation. On the one side, I’m all for meeting regular readers. On the other, I’m not particularly interested in Germany.

Search Engine results, featuring names, from yesterday:

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