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Feel -- Not In The Strict Sense

• Virginia State Police CBI Special Agent Trent and I conversed in person for precisely one hour. Near the beginning, Mr. Trent, in faux fairness, said he needed something to use against me wanted to get my “side” of the story. Even if you pretend I was the only one speaking the entire time, that’s a scrimpy sixty minutes I had in which, if I so desired (I didn’t), to change the guy’s nonsensical preformed opinion that I’m a homicidal basketcase concealing a Krakatoa and convince him I am instead a curiosity-consumed anomaly carting around a camera. Near the end, Investigator Trent nonchalantly enlightened me he’s literally spent weeks being influenced by his buddies about me meeting with the other “side.”

• Dasani was supposed to be the one to give me the No Trespassing order. That’s why he contacted me with his lunch invitation. Can you not just visualize me being ditched in some restaurant with the barment notice in one hand and the bill for my coffee and his doughnuts in the other?

• Supposedly there’s an image of an informant’s automobile (mixed in with others) somewhere on iHeArTEjade. I don’t deny it’s a possibility I’ve inadvertently put up a picture that included a cooperator’s car, however, due the extreme degree these law enforcement men have been dishonest with me already, I don’t believe it. Especially since when I stated to Agent Trent I’d remove it, he snorted and refused to tell me which photograph. So, to me, either they must not care that much about their snitches -- big surprise -- or they’re lying. If it really is here, I’d still very much like it not to be. In the meantime, remember there are 19.2 cavillion businesses other than JADE that parking lot is for. Assume the operator of the vehicle in question is eating dinner, watching a play, picking up a pack of cigarettes, getting a haircut, learning the results of an AIDS/HIV test…

• Outside the VA State Police office, Jason Trent posited a disconcerting question. It seemed like such a pertinent query you’d think he would’ve broached the subject when he was still recording our discussion instead of waiting until after he’d stopped. He was well aware I wasn’t preserving the discourse. To me, it was evident he only asked it, and with his audio device off, because he’s looking to find out if he has to cover it up. I hope he has the sense to know that if you don’t dig something up, you don’t have to rebury it.

• All in all I feel like the interaction…whoops, that reminds me. I used the word “feel” a few times over the course of our get-together and not a single instance didn’t the agent latch onto it as if I was on the edge of confessing to murder and he was going to aggravate me into blurting admission.

I would say something to the effect of: I put up what I feel like. Meaning, the entries I make on I HeArTE JADE stem from what’s on my mind that I think are relevant to write about.

But Mr. Trent was all: What you FEEL like? You FEEL mad at Longhead and that’s why you FEEL you have to put up a picture of his kids’ school. Isn’t that right? Right? RIGHT?

And then I’m thinking: Huh? What is he even talkin’ about? I bet he and Porn Star share the same psychiatrist.

It was easy to ignore his intentional provocation, given that never were his accusations based on facts. I felt he was doing it out of steep desperation and I feel sorry for him because he felt he had to stoop to using an outright transparent police tactic on me.

• Agent Trent declared frankly he did not want this case. According to him, he asked his superiors, on more than one occasion, why he was assigned it. The impression I got, judging by his comments and tone, is that he finds the whole thing boring and beneath him. I tend to agree. What I’m doing is going to be interesting to me alone and not an iota of it warrants a criminal investigation. By any lawman.