My New Crush

Hi Officer (name withheld -- for the time being, anyway)!

 I'm not sure if your interest in me derives from curiosity or challenge, but I am sure the guys and gals in your department would advise you against taking me on. They'd prolly suggest that, among other things, you should not unnecessarily conduct slow drive-by stare-downs of my motorcycle or look yourself up on I HeArTE JADE. They might point out that paying so much attention to me earned at least one member of Law Enforcement a sexy site of his very own. They may inform you that I thrive on ridiculing uppity lawmen. Even if you choose to disregard their counsel, let's be real, darlin', no matter what your intentions are, you can't possibly keep up with me. If you persist in this provocative behavior of yours, I'll have to assume it's because you want to become the next policeman I make fun of on here.

Kisses,

P.S. Tell your awesome Lieutenant I said "howdy."